iguessthatscool:

theonion:

Thursday Cry Moved Up To Wednesday Due To Scheduling Conflict 

Me
spoopystationmanagement:

phrux:

leakinginklikeblood:

lifemadesimple:

Plate Etiquette 

I did not know this.  

The fuck is wrong with rich people ‘hey do you want a second plate’ no i want to make up a secret passive aggressive fork language so we can titter mockingly at that rube from the country who says he enjoyed the meal with his fucking mouth

a secret passive aggressive fork language i can’t breathe

jurhfalastini:

Absolute recognition and appreciation for the Palestinian, Syrian, Kurdish and other women in the Middle East who willingly put their lives on the line and risk their safety fighting fascism, occupation, and Western imperialism. These are your true heroes. Not women who serve in the IDF, not women who serve in the US army, and definitely not women who serve in armies that serve Western interests. 

seriousjones:

gluten free person: excuse me, but do you have any gf options?

me:

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shingekinogf:

when your gf tries to break up with you

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youtomb:

sorry, my mom said to unfollow you =/

Kidnapper: Get in the fukin van
Me: Oh ok cool
Kidnapper: Wut
Me: This is a febreze commercial right
Kidnapper: Wut
Me: Smells pretty shitty in here to me tbh

passthatversayseee:

passthatversayseee:

"im angelina, you jennifer. come on bitch you see where brad at?" was the most unnecessary way to start a song like jennifer probably snapped her pink friday deluxe edition cd in half and threw it away at that moment

andd no doubt angelina was like

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